Don’t let your coach become a crutch

A coach should be much more than just a crutch. There are times when a crutch is necessary and at that point, it’s the right thing to lean on one for support. Walking and then running free require me to know when to let go of that crutch and say “I have got this now”.

I took a break from working with my coach for a few months. I was worried that I was becoming too dependent and thought it would be good to experience working with a few other coaches for a while. It was a good learning exercise. I met a lot of people in my quest to find a coach that suited my requirements. I thought a lot about what I wanted to work on in my coaching journey.

I found that I functioned perfectly well even without a coach. And yet I noticed a shift in my energy. I got back onto the treadmill of doing, doing, doing. Not enough pause between the races to evaluate if I was running in the right direction. I felt a shift away from self-awareness and it took a lot of willpower to slow down and ask myself some coaching questions. Questions helped me find the alignment between my “being” and my “doing”. Self-coaching is possible, but not easy. My coach could often sense and help me see things about myself that I could not see or that I was choosing not to confront.

I have now decided to resume my coaching journey, comfortable with the knowledge that I am not over-dependent. Equipped with the lessons learnt from taking a short break from coaching, I am sure I will get a lot more out of the next chapter. As a tennis player two analogies come to mind. First is the anticipation and excitement of getting back onto the court, a feeling of reconnecting with a space that I enjoy. The second is the ease and fun of playing with partners who know my game and are well-matched with me. And finally, having tried out a couple of different racquets, each with its unique features, settling back into a rhythm with the one that feels the most comfortable is a wonderful feeling. A good coach in this context is not a crutch, but an extension of me. Like a tennis racquet that helps me play my best game and helps me to enjoy every minute spent on the court.