The power of a single Chemistry Session coaching conversation
“Hello, Nikhil! A very happy new year. Just wanted to share with you - I was reflecting on our last conversation - roughly 8 months back, it feels so good to finally take a leap for my brand - Dhaage.
In these months, I moved to a new city, set up Dhaage’s first experiential store, did a PR launch event (finally using my PR skills for myself), and learned new tools like creating a website from scratch!
I wouldn’t have done this if wouldn’t have got your nudge - 8 months back. I have changed the direction of my life and I’m so happy from within. Just wanted to share it with you.”
Out of the blue, this beautiful WhatsApp message arrived like a New Year gift for me. A perfect reminder about the power of coaching to transform lives. Others and my own. In this particular case, it was just one single coaching session that happened to have made a significant difference in someone’s life.
The sample session (or what we often call the chemistry session) that I had with Karishma Panjwani proved to be powerful enough to catalyse change. The coaching process in many ways is about a series of nudges that often bring clarity, getting people in touch with their authentic selves. Helping all the elements that exist within a body come together in just the right proportion to ignite something and propel the forward. This journey of self-exploration eventually galvanises action that is aligned with one’s calling.
The chemistry session is such an important one to help both coach and client decide if they are a good fit for each other. There are many ways people approach this session ranging from a quick 20-minute sampler to the full one hour or more experience.
I have tried out various approaches and found that a preliminary 15-minute get-to-know-each-other conversation followed by a one-hour session is what works best for me. I can fit in a mini discovery session and often integrate the ‘life-balance wheel’ with permission from a client to see what is calling their attention.
A chemistry session is not just about business development, it is also an opportunity to be of service. Even if the client does not hire the coach post this session, the relationship can and often does blossom. The sample session may be a gateway towards helping the client finalise another coach, discover that therapy may be better support, or maybe just that one session is enough to support their need. Approaching a sample session with this intention has proved to be very helpful for me as a Coach. I do not worry about “converting the client” and while I do reflect post a session where the client decides not to work with me, I have stopped judging myself. I remind myself that this is why the chemistry session exists.
The ICF Core Competency 3 which relates to contracting, talks about the Coach's ability to establish and maintain agreements. It states that the coach “Partners with the client and relevant stakeholders to create clear agreements about the coaching relationship, process, plans and goals. Establishes agreements for the overall coaching engagement as well as those for each coaching session.” There are eleven different points related to CC3 and when I reflect on them about my chemistry coaching session with Karishma, the very last one jumps out at me.
CC 3.11 states that the coach “Partners with the client to end the coaching relationship in a way that honours the experience”. I believe putting this theory into practice was a big part of what elicited that wonderful message from her to me, even though I did not get hired as her coach.
It is impossible to say which coaching session will be the one that brings me to the tipping point. Each one is unique and offers its insights, but when strung together in a necklace there is cohesion and beauty that emerges.
A quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson brings this idea beautifully together.
“Life is a train of moods like a string of beads; and as we pass through them, they prove to be many coloured lenses, which paint the world their own hue, and each shows us only what lies in its own focus.” Each coaching session for me is like one of these beads that Emerson talks about. The lens through which I look at life often changes courtesy of a session, and that small or sometimes big change results in a shift in focus, and that is the game changer.
Trust the process, I have often told myself. Do not get too caught up in what each session delivers. There is value in every session and together a series of nudges is often what it takes to move forward. This message from Karishma was like a nudge for me. A sign from the universe to keep walking down the path that is calling me. Coach mode is on. Here I come.
Nikhil Dey is a certified ICF coach and founder of soul2solecoaching. He is the first recipient of the ICF India coaching excellence rising star award.
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